I suppose I am a little late getting to planting my vegetables this year, but April was such a crazy month, I didn’t have much time to do anything! So, May planting time it is. I am thankful that I am able to buy most of my vegetables, so if the garden doesn’t produce, we won’t starve. I doubt I would actually make it as a farmer, I am entirely too lazy.
So, last night while hubby mowed the backyard, Rivka and I were playing in the side yard with the potted plants. We planted her sunflower that Grandma gave her on Sunday, and then I pulled out a few other seed packets, and we planted peas, green beans, some sort of pepper, and pumpkin. It was rather frustrating to plant anything with Rivka who insisted on digging the seeds back up after we’d put them in there, and I probably lost my temper with the wind and her playing more than I should have, but I’m trying. I think it’s important to try and have her do some gardening, it’s a good hobby and it can be relaxing.
Anytime I think of gardening, I envision these elaborate floral gardens, large pumpkin patches and the like. I don’t have near enough energy to try and do any of that, but I can dream, can’t I? The book “The Secret Garden” is definitely a favorite of mine, and I yearn for a place of my own where I can be by myself. I have that perfect garden pictured in my mind, and sometimes when the stress is a bit much, I pop in Ariell’s “Enchanted Falls” CD and imagine I am there. It’s quiet, there’s a small waterfall in one corner, comfortable chairs. The temperature in the garden is hovering at around 70° with just the slightest breeze coming through. There are bees in the garden buzzing around the flowers. I have many colors of tulips there, some a rosy red, deep purples, a few yellow ones scattered here and there. There are apple trees to give me apples in the fall for applesauce, a shed over in the far corner of the garden that houses my gardening supplies and also acts as my canning station in the late summer. There’s also a bird feeder, a suet feeder, and squirrel feeder in the middle of the garden and I can sit and watch the birds from where I sit. The walk is made up of beautiful garden stones, and moss covers part of the ground creating a soft place to set my feet. The pumpkin patch is growing nicely and in the fall, we will have a great harvest, a most sincere patch if I ever saw one. My vegetable patch has rows of tomatoes, potatoes growing, and many herbs. It wouldn’t be a garden without basil and oregano, and I’ve gotten some mint growing there too. My bench is placed at the edge of the herb garden so the aromas of the various herbs will tickle my senses and entice me to think of new recipes to try. I have a table next to me where I place a book and a glass of iced tea. It never gets to warm in the garden and I can sit out in the sunlight for many hours just savoring the quietness and the solitude of the place. When I am refreshed, I can step outside the garden and be the mother, wife, and worker that is expected of me, but here in my garden, I can let my mind wander and my dreams take flight. I can imagine in that patch of flowers over yonder, fairies play and make merry mischief. I imagine creating a fairy garden someday and add that to the list of things to add to the garden. This is my place, no one else can enter, and I can be me.
I think each of us really need a place like that, be it real or imagined. Right now, that garden only exists in my mind, and it changes with how I’m feeling or what I need to see at the time.
Lately, I’ve been battling some pretty bad depression. April was very trying with getting the news about Rivka’s teeth to hubby working hours and hours of overtime. I’ve been irritable, unhappy, and feeling unloved and unappreciated. I know I’ve been snappish with my family and with people at work and I need to slow down, find that garden in my mind, and find the serenity in it. I used to go for walks when I worked at BI to calm myself down and give myself a break from the incessent noise of the phones ringing. When I worked at ASM, I did the same and found a wonderful garden and labryinth at a church in DC which helped me find the quiet and calm I needed. At ASCE, I have never found that. Despite being in the suburbs, I can’t ever seem to escape the noise. We have the W&OD trail nearby, but it is always crowded with people, and doesn’t provide the calm I need. Perhaps today is a day to search out a quiet place all for myself? Let’s go explore….

